Statistically, around 70% of Americans have cheated in some fashion (emotionally or otherwise). Cheating means something different for every relationship, so while this number may seem high, it may not be traditional infidelity. Regardless, infidelity in marriage is common.
Recovering from marriage infidelity isn’t easy. Discovering it can turn someone’s life upside-down.
We’re here to talk about a few steps you should take after learning about a partner’s infidelity.
Take Space and Time For Yourself
When you first learn about your spouse cheating, you are going to have many conflicting and overwhelming emotions. Some people immediately lash out while others will try to get back in their partner’s good graces despite their transgression.
It’s important that you and your partner give each other space. You both need time to cool off and figure out how you want to move forward before you open up a conversation. Even the person who cheated on their spouse will need that time.
Don’t rush into anything or you may do something you regret.
Usually, when people find out their partners cheating on them (perhaps with the help of a private investigator who can be hired from this website), they choose to keep the issue private from friends and family. This has pros and cons.
On one side, you’re allowing yourself to have complete control over the situation and who knows about it. You don’t have any outside influence (for better or for worse).
On the other hand, if you need support, it’s difficult to get it when you can’t explain why.
Open yourself up to support from friends and family members, even if that means you have to be vague about your situation. You need support now more than ever.
Open Up a Conversation
Once you’ve taken time to cool off, you’re going to have to talk about things with your partner. You can choose how this conversation goes. Expect it to be emotional and feel free to set boundaries and take a break if things get too intense.
It is not in your best interest to ask for details. This won’t be helpful, and if you choose to discuss them, it may be best if you do so with a counselor.
You may not be ready to determine whether you want to move forward with the relationship yet or you may already know.
Seeking counseling is one of the best things that you can do after infidelity. Whether you plan on staying in the relationship or leaving it, a counselor will help guide you through complicated emotions and conversations.
It is not a counselor’s job to tell you that you should stay in or leave a relationship. They can act as a mediator if you need one and help you develop an action plan if you choose to stay in the relationship.
Marriage Infidelity Is Complicated
Recovering from marriage infidelity isn’t a linear process and there’s no “wrong” way to go about it. Deciding whether to stay or leave is a personal process and no one can tell you the right answer.
A counselor, however, can help you find that answer on your own.
At Braden Counseling Center, we offer couples counseling, individual counseling, and more. Contact us to make an appointment and start your healing journey.